SOMETHING OF THE DAY!

Now that we've covered fun party hats, today's topic is religulous.

FREAKY RELIGIOUS PROPOGANDA OF THE DAY!













REAL REAL REAL SOON!

This is the condensed version, but you get the point.

A few things to note:
- All "scientific facts" pulled straight from the Focus on the Family handbook.
- The title of this one was "That Crazy Guy" in reference to this swinging cat.
- Make sure to check out such other fun reading as Stairway to Hell, How to be a Successful Example of What Not to Do, and Please Come Into My ?$@#*, Lord Jesus.


Have a great weekend now. And don't forget Jesus will protect you from AIDS so go have a good time!

Asking the important questions:

Last night, I was talking to my wife about our landlord. Not a big fan of our landlord. So, I off-handedly mentioned something about strangling her (the landlord, not my wife).

My wife of course at that point calls me out on saying that I would strangle our landlord, because she is a woman. "I have never heard a man say he would strangle another man," she says. "You would say you would kick a man's ass, but a woman you would strangle." At first I was defensive, but she's right, and I told her so. Why perpetuate that kind of power myth and submission by violence? A woman should be one's equal. A woman should be on the same footing as a man and should from there be judged by her own merit.

So, of course, this begs the question, "What is the politically correct way to torture a woman?"

My wife didn't have a lot of answers to that one.

I will take suggestions in the comment section. I need to know by the time rent is due. Thanks.

-Brett

Brett Doesn't Wear Underwear Much

(See Brett's question 2 posts below)

Yesterday was definitely a good day as far as our friendship goes, but I was/am sick. You think I have time in between self pity and watching my back in times of desperate economic turmoil to worry about your fly?

And on top of that, you don't wear underwear. That means that your supremely sensitive balls should have picked up on the extra air flow and told your brain to tell your grimy fingers to take care of it yourself.

Where oh where does personal responsibility fit into today's cut throat friendships?

-Anthony

SOMETHING OF THE DAY!

Regular bloggers are the best. You can tell they have drive and purpose and they really believe that people are hanging on their every word. Which of course they are. Which is to say I are.

While I might not blog daily [or even weekly or monthly], I do refresh my browser about every 30-40 seconds in case something new happens on the internet, hanging on every word so as not to miss anything. I would so hate to be the 2nd or 3rd person to see that delicious new morsel of hilarity that my obscure friend posted on his/her even obscurer blog. If I don't read that NYTimes article or see the newest viral video on YouTube within minutes of it's posting, I'm frankly not terribly interested.

Last I checked sloppy seconds was a bad thing.

In an effort to engage our readers and put our mark on our tiny little-trod corner of the intersphere, I present to you:

SOMETHING OF THE DAY!

Damn. Wish that could have been a little more impressive.

Anyway, some people have Quotes of the day or pictures of the day or news quizzes or whatever. We're going to focus on that last category. The whatever part.

So without further ado, here is

SOMETHING OF THE DAY!



It's a guy with a chili pepper for a hat! Oh man, what will the internet think of next.

Tune in again tomorrow for another harrowing installment.


-Brett

I won't say I'm feeling betrayed, but...

So, we were hanging out, ya know, working all day yesterday, and we were getting on well. I won't say it was Earth shattering, but definitely pleasant and I felt like our friendship was stronger for it. You laughed at my jokes, I engaged your arguments, we ate some chips and dip. Good stuff.


So here's the question, Anthony:

When were you planning on letting me know my fly had been unzipped the whole time?









From your silence, I'm going to guess never. And here I thought I was beginning to know you.



-Brett

Bit of a Peeve

One thing that i think is annoying that is really becoming quite the trend is when people try to brag about the intellectual things that they do and label themselves as "nerds". I'm sorry if you fall into this category (I do it too), but you must know that it is a transparent trait. Here are some examples:

"...yeah, I was going to go out, but then, oh god I'm such a nerd, I ended up getting really into 'Faulkner's essays of a Tyrant' and before I knew it, the night was over."

-Yeah, you clearly just didn't feel like going out, and also wanted to let us know that you read superior subject matter, that no one else has the patience for. Obviously, you don't think you're a nerd for it or you would be insecure about and not tell us. Nobody asked. Remember that.

"...Well, I thought Tropic Thunder was good, God I'm such a dork, I watch movies differently though, like from a director's point of view and, like breakdown the exposition and character development and so forth. It's such a plague to have to watch movies like that."

-No. You choose to watch movies like that. It's fine to say it and then have a conversation about the mechanics and structure of the movie if you want. But don't assume that no one else has ever thought about how a movie is made, just because you had a film class or two in college.

"...I know, I'm lame. I can't get anything done throughout the rest of the day unless I run 4 miles in the morning."

-Usually this is paired with having a very good body and positive personality, which I love in people. But it is, in no way, lame to run in the morning. you're better for it and that is why you do it. And you know damn well that everyone else wishes that they ran every morning, but they don't have the discipline to do it.

I don't hate the people that do this at all. I just don't see the point in not being up front about it and be proud of what you're interested in.

Sorry I haven't blogged in forever.

Anthony

Do yourself a Favor

"Like instead of wanting to be more frugal with my water usage or curb my carbon emissions, I rather was filled with a desire to cut down a tree, shove it up an endangered panda’s ass, strap the panda to the hood of a Hummer and drive to an Arby’s parking lot to give away free nuclear bombs to obese children."

This is just a little shard of brilliance that you could be ingesting if you were to check out my friend Mark's blog.

Your welcome, you low life's. You're stupid and illegit for not having found it yourself.