Wednesday, December 5, 2007

You Know What I'm gonna put In my diary Brett?

A little thing called WHY THE FUCK DO RESTAURANTS KEEP THE TAILS ON SHRIMP WHEN THEY PUT THEM IN FOOD! ESPECIALLY THAI PLACES. AND THEIR SOUPS. BUT NOT JUST THEM. IT'S EVERYWHERE, THEY JUST GET THE BAD REP. BECAUSE THEY USE SO MUCH SHRIMP. NOT AN EXCUSE THOUGH. CUT THE FUCKING TAILS OFF. IT'S SOUP!

AND OLIVES! I LOVE OLIVES. EVERYONE ELSE FIGURES OUT HOW TO TAKE SEEDS OUT. YOUR FANCY SEEDS DON'T MAKE THEM TASTE BETTER. IN FACT, IT FORCES FANCY PEOPLE TO HAVE TO SPIT OUT SEEDS IN THE MIDDLE OF A FANCY FINGER-FOODED PARTY. Unless fancy people are so fancy that they just bit the bullet and swallow the seeds so they don't have to spit. THINK ABOUT IT! HAVE YOU EVER SEEN A FANCY PANTS SPIT OUT A SEED? I HAVEN'T. AND THAT'S THE TYPE OF SHIT THAT I LOOK FOR WHEN I'M HANGING WITH FANCY PANTS'S. I HOPE THAT IF YOU TAKE A X-RAY OF ALL FANCY PANTS'S STOMACHS THAT WILL FIND A BIG PILE OF OLIVE SEEDS IN THERE. GOSH, I'D JUST LAUGH.....AND POINT.........RIGHT AT THE X-RAY X-RAY SLIDE....Then I'd say to the doctor (when I gained composure) "Hey Doc. DO you have one from the side? Let's see it! No wait, wait, my mouth hurts from laughing, hold on......Okay I'm ready". But then it would get awkward because we often forget that doctors are fancy pants's and they have olive seeds in their bellies, and he would reply "I'm glad you find this so funny."

Then I'd put my head down and feel ashamed....Until I thought of a reply and I started to laugh because I couldn't keep from laughing so I might as well say it......"It's better than having a tummy full of cummy!" Then I run out of the office as fast as I can.

Then I ask myself, "Why were I in the Doc's office looking at other people's X-rays?"


THAT'S ALL

-ANTHONY

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